When I first gave a best man wedding toast, I was terrified. It is, after all, a big responsibility. It is also one of the more memorable parts of a wedding reception – from television to films to novels, the best man wedding toast has become quite famous. Unfortunately, that sets expectations quite high for a best man wedding toast. Thankfully, I was able to pull it off without embarrassing myself. In doing so, I noticed that there a few easy rules that any best man can follow.
Below are a few quick pointers that can allow even the most nervous public speaker to make a memorable and appropriate best man wedding toast. Perhaps the most important thing to remember is that the day should be about the bride and groom. While every best man wants his best man wedding toast speech to be memorable, it should not overshadow the couple on their special day. This means keeping the best man wedding toast speech tasteful, happy, and (most of all) short. If you find yourself going past the five-minute mark, you have simply gone too far. Make sure the best man wedding toast speech is personal without being too full of inside jokes, entertaining without being inappropriate, and try your best to make sure that it paints the bride and groom in a flattering light. My personal favorite example of this was my best man’s speech at my own wedding – he told a story about our teenage years that involved my wife. It was short, sweet, and appropriate for any audience.
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Next, try to make your speech work with your personality, not against it. If you are not naturally funny, do not try to force jokes into your best man wedding toast. If you are naturally flippant, do not try to fill it with an over the top sense of gravity. The groom chose you as his best man for a reason, and try to remember that when composing your speech. Speak from the heart – whether short or long, funny or serious, it needs to be authentic. So long as your speech reflects the nature of your friendship, you will be fine. My best man wedding toast speech was a little more than two minutes long, and this seems to be the average for most “good” speeches that I have heard.
So long as you tailor your best man wedding toast to the bride and groom, stay true to your own personality, and keep the other guests in mind, your speech should be remarkably easy to give. Try to remember above all else that this is one of the biggest days of your friend’s life, and treat the situation with appropriate gravity. After all, the wedding will only have one toast from the best man.
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These tips worked for me, and they should grant you a measure of success in your attempt to give a great best man wedding toast.
Best man wedding toast at my sister’s wedding was the highlight of the night. Everyone already knew that she married a great guy but to have the groom’s best man (who happened to be his best friend) tell everyone how much my sister meant to him made almost everybody in the room reach for a handkerchief. That is to say that the best man wedding toast at that reception said everything that really needed to be said that night.
It is during the reception that family members and family friends gather to celebrate the new couple by eating and drinking. It is also during the reception where the best man wedding toast that put into words the celebration of the moment are held.
Now, the best man wedding toast is important because of the role the best man plays at the wedding. In most cultures, the best man acts as the groom’s foremost male assistant at the wedding; it is his job to ensure that the guests are ushered into the wedding hall and that the groom has everything he needs. Traditionally, the best man would either be a close relative or close friend of the groom.
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The fact that the best man at the wedding had been the husband’s best friend made his best man wedding toast all the more touching. The best man was someone that the groom had known all his life and it was his word that confirmed how happy the groom was with his bride.
The best man knew enough about the couple to make the best man wedding toast funny and he also knew, as a friend, what it really meant to the couple to finally get married
The role of the best man is to represent the groom at the wedding, but they need to keep in mind that a wedding is to celebrate the union of the groom and his bride so the toast should honor both parties.
A best man needs to stay away from and not highlight the following information when making a best man wedding toast:
1. The bachelor party and the details of the activities that happened at the bachelor party if in any way it could reveal unfavorable activities on behalf of the groom. The best man wedding toast is not an opportunity to reveal all groom secrets.
2. Your opinion of the union of the bride and groom if it is not favorable. This is not your wedding so make sure your best man wedding toast is favorable of the union, and celebrates the relationship.
3. Any alcohol or drug activity that would put the groom in a bad light. Too many best man wedding toast highlight the drunken activities of the groom. Is it because the toast is using alcohol? We will never know using the best man wedding toast as an excuse to do a shooter of tequila, is not the best way to honor the day.
4. Work activity that is of no interest to the audience or can be perceived as promotion, public relations or marketing.
5. A full ‘Roast of the Groom’ where people may not understand that your intention is humorous, done in jest, and is compiled as a roast. A roast is meant for a different audience, for a different occasion and should not be confused with the celebrations of a wedding.
6. Provide wedding advice if the best man does not have a reputable track record in the marriage field. The groom may take you off the podium if you do this, so keep it simple.
The best man wedding toast needs to focus on the bride, the union of the couple, the value of your relationship with the couple and the influence they have had on your life. It is a toast that honors and plays tribute to the bride and groom. Too many best man wedding toast focus on past activities of the groom, stories which the bride may not know, and can end up being a negative experience for the bride.
Your best man wedding toast should be a positive first toast to the bride and the union of the couple, while reflecting the influence and friendship the couple has had on your life.
